sashaforthewin:

metasavant:

tindershwinder:

…I’m an archaeologist

What a damn mood

It’s not what you think, it’s just digging up dead people!

heardbook:

wrestleman:

curioscurio:

i BURST OUT laughing at this and when my dad in the next room asked “what’s so funny” i said “nothing i can explain succinctly”

Torment

shittymoviedetails:

anarchocunt:

keepmeoutofyourdreams:

anarchocunt:

wetdress:

gone girl is how blonde white women go insane and black swan is how brunette white women go insane

What about gingers?

Carrie

Originally posted by muvana

funnytwittertweets:

athenavine:

aaaaa42:

will olaf and minions ever end. will i be forced to live the rest of my life occasionally seeing olaf and minions

Said the Baudelaire children.

laughconfetti:

doodlegirll:

This is one of the funniest holiday cards I have ever seen.

this has been in my queue for an entire year

minuns:

This is the funniest glitch that’s ever happened to me in a Pokémon game

mountaindewdarkberrybash:

mosticonicposts:

invokingbees:

weeniebagel:

invokingbees:

Walk into your kitchen at 3am and this wizard is waiting for you, having drunk your beer and sampled, but disliked, your potato chips, hasn’t done the dishes, and he isn’t happy

What do you do?

“Really, Carl? Really? Christ, I knew the breakup with Cindy was bad-but not THIS bad! How’d you even get in my house? Why are the Utz all over the floor? Wh- how did you get in my house!?”

“Damn your fool’s mind, Randy, the mists of dream still you know my Amulet of Saros allows me passage through all portals, physical and arcane. I came here as this apartment provides protection from the mental ravaging of that dark sorceress, Cindy, gods blast her name! Your fermented beverages are all that have kept me from darkness this night, Randy, would you turn me away in this hour of terror?”

certified iconic post

everyone talking about wizard posting needs to pay respects to the original

groblin-official:

angstytwat:

thewindowofthesummerhouse:

waldemar kazak

bitch ex wife. cant believe she took my orb

standard-dingo:

tony-hawks-underground:

shitposting-hobbits-to-gallifrey:

safety–not–guaranteed:

sandmandaddy:

Was gonna tag the aquafresh guy then I remembered he got banned for avengers spoilers

That wasn’t why he was banned, he was banned for some connection to an online anti-fascist hacker group that hacked neo-nazis accounts and filled them with pictures of Woody from toy story

How soon yall forget woody’s round up

it’s weird that we’ve reached a point in tumblr’s history where people somehow remember the woody’s roundup thing as being perpetrated by an “anti-fascist hacker group” when in reality it was just some furry funnyman with a piss kink snatching up urls of deactivated blogs he didn’t like

frogmintmilk:

Made in Oven?

prrb:

sweetoothgirl:

Black Sesame Milk